These last 3 days have been a real emotional roller coaster. I wish it could all just level out for David but I guess we all seem to go through our ups and downs.
On Monday when we arrived at PT, remember this is after the Friday that I dumped David on the ground - he was still a bit sore. He put on his legs to give it a try and the pain was a bit more than he had anticipated. It took about 4 steps and was really feeling the HO as it gave him the sensation of bones grinding against each other. He stopped and got a bit angry, not at me, just at the fact that he might be slowed down again. He gritted his teeth and said, "Let's Go!" He was so mad that he just kept walking - 2 straight laps which would be approximately 230 yards.
It reminded me of some of our time at Walter Reed. While there we were around a great number of Marines that had a variety of serious injuries. As we watched them work out, we noticed that almost every one of them had stretch marks between their arm pits and their shoulder. It was from running with 80 to 120 pound packs - the shoulder straps would stretch their skin as they stretched their physical limits. David, no matter what the pain was, was not going to be stopped. David's walking, April is following him with a rolling stool, and I'm following her with the wheelchair in case he needs to stop. I can't remember the name of the dance, but I'm in the back humming "do da do da do do, do da do, do da do da do do, dooo dooo dooo!" We try to make all of it fun if we can. People all around the hall are calling out encouragement from their offices. It's really quite inspiring. All in all, Monday felt like a great day.
Tuesday was a bit different, David started in Occupational Therapy and they really worked on his hand and arm - one of the therapists doesn't allow herself to look at David's face when she is doing the therapy because, when she sees how much pain David is enduring, she wants to stop. The other therapist is really quite different, she watches David's legs because, when she gets to the really painful point, David's legs shoot off the table. I can assure you that David does not enjoy some of these little signals as much as the therapists do, but he still laughs and kids about it.
We went to PT early and I saw there was a Yoga class in process so I grabbed a mat and jumped into the Yoga exercises. My shoulders are still sore - she said I was a natural but I think she had to say that because her last name is LYON and she may want me to try it again. David was stretching his muscles on the table in front of me and I think he was enjoying watching his dad in some pain. The instructor kept saying "...breathe out and that's good..." I'm thinking, how can something so painful be "Good!"
When the Yoga class was completed, David put on his new legs that had been revised. They were pushing on areas that were extremely painful and I took the bad leg over to prosthetics to have them make some other adjustments. Once he was standing, David realized that his effort from the day before had put a stop to anymore walking today. It was a bit of a discouragement, but Thursday will be another day.
I said Thursday and you thought I must have made a mistake but you are mistaken. I said Thursday because Wednesday was the funeral for Joshua James "JJ" Cullins who gave his life in Afghanistan on October 19, 2010. He was on his way to pick up his replacements when he was hit. The funeral was in the Cathedral of Our Lady of the Angels in Los Angeles. There had to be at least 2000 men and women in Uniform as JJ was on the LAPD and went back to Afghanistan in a Reserve role. The funeral was beautiful and I want to give you some of the information that really touched me. I think I was crying before we even got there - I really hurt when I think any of those I love are hurting.
For those of you that have never heard "The Marine Prayer", here it is:
Almighty Father, whose command is over all and whose love never fails, make me aware of Thy presence and obedient to Thy will. (All my life I have prayed that my children would recognize the will of our Heavenly Father and put His will first!) Keep me true to my best self, guarding me against dishonesty in purpose in deed and helping me to live so that I can face my fellow Marines, my loved ones and Thee without shame or fear. Protect my family. Give me the will to do the work of a Marine and to accept my share of responsibilities with vigor and enthusiasm. Grant me the courage to be proficient in my daily performance. Keep me loyal and faithful to my superiors and to the duties my country and the Marine Corps have entrusted to me. Make me considerate of those committed to my leadership. Help me to wear my uniform with dignity, and let it remind me daily of the traditions which I must uphold. If I am inclined to doubt, steady my faith; if I am tempted, make me strong to resist; if I should miss the mark, give me courage to try again. Guide me with the light of truth and grant me wisdom by which I may understand the answer to my prayer. Amen
It's amazing to me that so many young men join the military to get away from the strict influence of their parents and they walk into a fantastic organization, The United States Marine Corps, and are taught exactly what most parents have been trying to teach their children all their lives. It is a beautiful prayer and it was printed on the program for the funeral.
The Cathedral had a gentleman singing on several occasions and he had one of the most beautiful Tenor voices I have heard. His singing placed a beautiful peace on the situation. A couple quotes that really struck me and gave me pause, as I sat next to my son and Joe Fraley, were "An ordinary man doing extraordinary things!" and "All gave some, some gave all!" My son gave all he knew to give and it cost him some of himself, many of his friends were in the process of giving all they could give until the time came that there was no more they could give. It was an amazing time for me to reflect on the 2000 or so men and women in that Cathedral who do just that every day. They are beautiful, amazing, strong, courageous, and a tribute to humanity. The last thought that really struck me and continues to humble me is the same thing that was said of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, "No one has greater love than this, that one should lay down his life for his friends..." These young men and women are doing what our Savior has already done and has asked us to do. We are those friends, the Iraqi and Afghani people are those friends, and these soldiers, heroes, warriors are out there showing the greatest love that can be shown - they're offering the safety of their own life for their friends, their comrades, for people they have never meet and will, more than likely never meet, and for us. It is really quite a bit to comprehend and makes me think of my own pettiness from time to time.
It was an absolutely beautiful tribute to, whom I understand, was a great man.
I hope I didn't take this blog a little too far, but you have to admit, this whole situation has made us all reflect a little deeper than we may have before. Even more amazing is that these men and women don't look at their service in this way at all, it is just what has to be done - plain and simple. As I sit here just thinking about what I've written, I gain a new love and appreciation for my Wife and for each of my children and the challenges they all face. To Lynnette, Christina, Michael, Rachelle, David, Mary, JJ, and Stephen, I love you very very much and am very proud of every one of you.
Good Night
I love you too Mom and Grandma Tasto
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
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Love you too dad! Tell David that I love him too.
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